Plugged in and ready to fall

I just scored a pass for an advance screening of Hancock, and I have to admit- I'm pretty stoked. I'd written Will Smith off after Men in Black: 2 (and let's not forget the humorless, cinematic dirty bomb known as "Bad Boys 2), but the one, two punch combination of "I Am Legend," and now, "Hancock," have forced me to reclaim my seat aboard the Fresh Prince Band Wagon.

Granted, "I Am Legend" wasn't perfect- it completely ignored the ending in Matheson's novel, which made me wonder why they even bothered keeping the title- but Smith's performance was amazing. For the first time in years, he was acting, instead of blurting out weak one-liners and cashing a paycheck.

I know test audiences haven't been very kind to "Hancock," but I'm not sure if the people at the screenings even understood what kind of film they were about to see. The trailers make the movie out to be a broad, FX-laden action/ comedy, but- unless the script has been completely overhauled- it's actually a pretty dark, cynical take on the whole superhero genre.

It looks like Se7en's first English language R&B album should be hitting stores pretty soon. I wish I could get excited about this- I mean, the guy has an incredible voice, and his videos are so tightly-choreographed, he makes Justin and Usher seem lazy and uncoordinated by comparison.

Still, I've been here before, and it always ends the same way. Toshinobu Kubota, Utada Hikaru, Coco Lee, Seiko: They've all released R&B albums in the States, only to have them end up in the cutout bin alongside Jeremy Jordan and Ray J. Regardless of quality, it's been made painfully clear that Asian pop/soul artists will never make an impact over here.

It doesn't matter how much money they sink into their debut, or how many rappers they collaborate with (FYI: Fabolous and Three 6 Mafia will appear on Se7en's US debut), Asian R&B acts have about as much chance of connecting with the US market as I have of connecting my penis to Megan Goode's vagina.

I was looking through Blender 's review section this afternoon when I came across their rating for Portishead's "Third." They gave it 1 1/2 stars. Seriously. Then again, this IS the same rag that gave Dem Franchize Boyz four stars for screaming gibberish over crappy, Casio-quality beats. BTW: The Green Lantern Corps. has obviously lowered it's standards as of late.